Saturday, February 16, 2013

Spiritual Friday: On Beauty and Raising Kids (calmly)

Hello Friends. Even though this post was way ready, I forgot to post it yesterday. Nonetheless I hope you had a great Friday. As I mentioned before, my Spiritual Friday series focuses more on the spiritual aspect of life. These posts are not always related to decorating, but neither is my life. While I love decorating and the main focus of this blogs is making a home away from home, my life as a whole is more balanced than that.

I wanted to share this post last Friday, but the kids won my time over the blog. ;o) Last Friday morning I woke up quickly to catch the Fajr prayer, when I finished I found this beauty of a sight....



The pictures don't do it justice, but I think you get get the point. When I saw the sky looking like that, (and catching my prayer on time) it really set a nice mood for the day. I felt lucky, like I won a prize for making my prayer on time. Had I missed my prayer, I would have missed the sky in all its beauty. 

It was also an eye opening moment for me to watch my middle son be so impressed by the sky. He woke up early and came to my bed to wake me up snuggle :o) In the cutest most surprised voice he asked "The sky is pink?" It was adorable and really reminded me how innocent he and all my kids are. 

Later in the day I went to Friday prayer, and I saw another very cute act of kindness. A mother and her son, about 6 years old, were standing next to each other in prayer. As usual of many kids, his mind wondered and he started wiggling his arms during prayer. His mom gently brought them back down and gave  him a gentle side hug so as to remind him he is still in the prayer. It was a very heartwarming sight to see. 

From the start of the day till the end, I noticed my kids being silly and childish in such a sweet way. I really needed that. I needed to be reminded that kids are just that and I needed to take a chill pill. I've been getting burnt out by my kids lately and as a result, missing some of their sweetness. While some of their actions totally warrant a mental breakdown, I think I could have avoided many mental breakdowns if I stopped putting so much pressure on my own self and just focused on them. 

My kids are 2, 5 and 7. Their intelligence causes them to say things beyond their age, and ask deep questions that need strong answers, but that doesn't mean they really are beyond their age. It's as if they are tricking me with their bursts of maturity. In the end they act their age and their age is young. I constantly remind myself of my own actions when I was their age. I remember doing a lot of annoying things for no apparent reason other than "I just wanted to." 

 I keep telling myself sometimes they don't even know why they do particular things, don't be so harsh on them. It could be their subconscious deeply investigating out of curiosity. Who knows?

I've also relaxed on the the food front. Each of my kids is taking turns not eating certain meals of the day. The oldest doesn't eat breakfast (going on a couple months now) the middle doesn't eat dinner, (going on a couple weeks) and the youngest likes to mix it up, but misses at least one meal a day. 

I remember taking FOREVER to eat. Sometimes, I had ZERO appetite. I felt my stomach was the size of a pin head and I couldn't for the life of me, get any food in it. I remember that feeling so I don't push too hard to force my kids to eat. I give three chances. I ask if they are hungry before dinner is ready, again when dinner is on the table, and finally I ask for the last time just before I put the food away. Sometimes I give my middle son one table spoon of each food group and he can barely finish that. Other times they only want yogurt, milk or something light. As long as they don't eat junk (chips, candy etc. I'm hopeful it's just a phase they will outgrow. This could be the calm before the (teenage food consumption) storm :oO  I've lead my horses to water, the rest is up to them. 

Raising kids is the hardest thing I have ever done and will ever do in my entire life. Harder than anything you think is the hardest. This day was a real boost, a mental and emotional recharge that helped me step back and let my kids be kids. It won't last forever and I don't want to let the hard times prevent me from enjoying the good times, and my ability to raise them as amazing adults. I share these thoughts and feelings as words of encouragement and support for all parents. 

-Debora





1 comment:

  1. ndewidar@hotmail.comFebruary 18, 2013 at 11:16 AM

    so beautiful & well said ,isn't this the abselute truth about kids & what to expect from them,thanx for the reminder all parents need it every now & then.

    ReplyDelete

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